Parents who are going through a divorce must balance the end of the marriage with their children’s need to have loving parents. Thankfully we have decades worth of research to help guide us through the process and better ensure we succeed on both fronts. Although the best option varies depending on the details of the case, when it comes to the children’s relationship with their parents’ psychology experts often recommend a joint arrangement whenever possible.
Why is joint custody recommended?
First, it is important to point out that in Florida the term custody refers to physical and legal custody of the children. Who the child spends time with falls into the category of physical custody. Ideally, psychologists state children should have an active relationship with both parents. They also note that there is not a “one size fits all” answer to this problem. Each family is unique and will need to find the arrangement that works best for their situation. For some, this could be a 50/50 split while others may find a 25/75 split works better.
Regardless of the chosen arrangement, the goal is for each parent to have quality time with the children. Once an arrangement is chosen, tips to help better ensure it works well include:
- Communication. Parents need to be able to communicate with each other. Each parent will need to know about everything from homework and extracurriculars to health concerns. Find a way to do this without animosity. Some are comfortable with brief conversations while others do best using an app or shared online calendar.
- Cooperation. A parenting plan or custody arrangement provides the guidelines for the relationship. It is important for both parents to enter the agreement willing to cooperate with the other parent to make the arrangement work for the children.
Although generally best, it is important to recognize that there are instances when spending time with a parent is not wise, such as those with a history of abuse or neglect.
What does the law say?
The law varies by state, but Florida, like most, focuses on what is best for the children. This is guided by the best interest of the child standard which includes a review of a number of factors. The court will review factors like the age and health of the child, the historic relationship between the child and parent, and the likelihood each parent will encourage the child to have a relationship with the other parent.
Choosing the best parenting time arrangement after a divorce is a complex decision that requires careful consideration of various factors. Each family is unique, and what works for one may not be suitable for another. By understanding the factors that influence court decisions, parents can make informed choices that prioritize their children’s best interests and find an arrangement that works for their family.